Not getting the support I’d hoped for from my partner regarding sterilization surgery

I have an IUD but want to take the next step and get a bilateral salpingectomy. The issue is I am young and while I think I could find a doctor thanks to this sub, my boyfriend is very hesitant about me getting the surgery. I hinted at vasectomy for him but I think he is disinterested in that which is valid; his body his choice. However he seems to not be convinced that I made up my mind and worries that I will regret it later. I know I will not – even if I do want to have kids later I sure as hell don’t want to be pregnant and am more into adoption or surrogate. Anyways, it hurts me to t hi nk that he doesn’t support this when I have known for years I am CF. Not to mention he is a wonderful partner and isn’t dead set on having kids, more a fence sitter but that’s the problem. He isn’t convinced of what I want. He knows I don’t want kids but thinks since I have an IUD that I might as well leave it alone “just in case”.

It’s really frustrating, like he’s not the one who would have to deal with the pregnancy and even though we use condoms what if I get raped? I tell him all this but he just continues to push only keeping the IUD. which I understand is really effective, but I just want to be super set by sterilizing now. I am a very impatient person who when I decide I want something I want to get it done as soon as possible which is why I want the bisalp sooner rather than later. The only issue is my partner. It hurts. He’s perfect in other aspects except this. I’m worried that since we can’t see eye to eye on this there are other problems on the horizon for us. I worry that he secretly does want kids more than he lets on and if we stay together he will resent me. I also am hurt bc it feels like he doesn’t trust my judgment to make my own decisions. I get that I can be paranoid and fearful but this is something I actually put a lot of thought into. I don’t want to “wait til we are about 35 or 40 and then we can see” – I KNOW I don’t want to get pregnant and I want to ensure that won’t happen now! But he fought me on it. Saying shit like “I don’t want you to regret it” and “you dont know what the future will hold” and like “you changed your mind about dating, maybe this will change too”.

Okay? But you know me. You should know that’s what I want. If you cared about me you would at least try to understand and support me even if you disagreed.

I get he doesn’t want me to regret it later but I know I won’t. I know there’s possible complications to the surgery but it is relatively safe and I have confidence the docs know what they’re doing. I just wish I could make him understand me. I dont want to lose him but don’t know if I can get over this.