Experience of getting referred in the UK (rant)

So this is a rant, mostly because I don’t think I can report it anywhere and need to get it off my chest! Sorry for bad formatting, am on mobile.

Late November 2021: I get a referral for sterilisation from my GP. No issues, been asked if I’m sure, said yes, the referral was sent off into the ether. I’m optimistic.

February 2022: have my first telephone consultation. The consultant tells me NHS doesn’t carry out sterilisations on women my age. I told her respectfully that’s not true, otherwise I wouldn’t get the referral in the first place. She changes her tactic and tells me it’s a big decision I might regret. I shoot back with “if I came to you pregnant right now you wouldn’t tell me it’s a big decision or ask if I really thought this through to have a baby”.
This seemed to have persuaded her and I get told she will book a follow up face to face appointment for a second opinion, but she makes sure to let me know that I might have to wait 3-4 months after that to see if I haven’t changed my mind. By that time I’m like whatever just book the next appointment!

May 2022: still no follow up appointment, I call to chase them up, get told I’m on a waitlist, but still get a letter for a follow up TELEPHONE appointment within a week in June

June 22: “sorry we had to reschedule your appointment for early July”
Yeah ok, stuff happens…

Late June 22: “sorry we had to reschedule your appointment for late July”.
By now I’m getting annoyed and call to ask what is going on, and straight up tell the woman they are undermining my decision by constantly changing the appointment. I get the “sorry it’s out of our control” story.

Back to waiting to end of July

You’d think that’s annoying in itself, but wait, THERE’S MORE


It’s June, My husband gets annoyed with how I’m being treated, tells me we will pursue my sterilisation privately if we need to.
In the meantime he wants to do his bit, visits the GP on a Thursday, gets referred.
Following Monday he has his vasectomy scheduled for late August 2022….

I feel like punching a wall.